Dear Friends,
“All good things must come to an end.” For every time
something good happens to me, this phrase comes and then the good times end. I
think this is fitting because life is a rollercoaster. My life is more of a
demon drop. Once something good occurs I am at the top. Once life goes to shit,
I drop 20 stories to the ground. As I was thinking about the downward spiral I was
in from 2006 to 2009, I was hoping for the good things. I was blessed but not
enough. That phrase is the basis of this blog because if I am not having good
things then when does it end.
I live each day in the simplest way. I live moment to
moment, day to day, and step by step. I try not to think about tomorrow because
today is not finished. When something is good in someone’s life, you don’t want
it to end. The ending of good things makes a person depressed. With that said,
I think most of my depression is because of the good times ending abruptly. As
much as I want to be happier in my life, too many good things are lost because
of life’s turns.
Someone once told me that the end of something is the
beginning of something else. I still have not seen the beginning of something
else. I always see the end of something and then the return of something. I
have been in a twisted series of cycles. I find myself going back to the same
women. I use to be happy for that but that’s the twist of the end.
So would that mean since I am not dating, the cycle is over
and there will not be anymore good times? I don’t have that answer right now,
but I am trying to see if I am able to deal with the beginning of something new
and fresh. Also to be free from the cycles I have been in. For now, I will try
to change my life and change the some of my thoughts but tomorrow is what I
live for at the end.
Eugene Chandler III
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