Dear Friends,
I want to thank a friend for the inspiration for this entry. Sometimes friends give you good ideals without realizing it. She recently showed me that some people don't or won't change. Some people like to hold grudges or hold on to things said. Some people tend to use these things to come up with bullshit reasons to distance themselves from the world. She also showed me that people assume because you aren't home that coming back home would help but some people leave home to see the world and more. Sometimes being elsewhere makes you happier than being home miserable.
First of all, doing these blogs are more for people to see me as human. I might have made mistakes in my life but I am human and flawed. People kill me saying that they are perfect. Perfection isn't achieved so easily. Most people need to see that being perfect isn't a fix all. I am not perfect but I write these blogs to show that my life is munday most days but other days I have excitement.
Second of all, most people say writing is a tedious thing. I find that writing is a lost form these days. Most of us tend to send a quick tweet or post something in short sentences. I miss when people would write long letters and also take their time to think about what to write and how to say it. I learned some time ago that people don't read books like they use to. Now you can read things digitally. Same goes with newspapers. A news reporter these days have to not only write an article but tweet about it and also do a video about the story. So when someone who wrote a book says writing is tedious should honest see how things are now. I love to write when I have a chance to because it allows me to think about my words and also how my words will show my thoughts.
Finally, I have admitted many times in my blogs that I suffer from depression. Doing this makes me feel some relief because I don't have to internalize things. Depression is an illness and most people deal with it differently. Some listen to music, some do artisitc things but I tend to write or be vocal. Even though the depression isn't going away but for a short period of time, it does makes things look brighter. I live day to day but when I do these entries, I show my daily events as it is and learn from it.
Your Friend,
Eugene
Friday, August 12, 2016
Wednesday, August 10, 2016
Birthday Blowout 2016: Getting Older with Pain
Dear Friends,
Well it has been a busy couple of days. First of all, I have been getting help with my busted right knee. I found out back in April that my right knee is busted. Cracked kneecap, a small tear in my knee and fluid in my knee. So like my mother and my father, I have bursitis or arthritis in my knee. Basically, I cannot try to move like a young chicken anymore. The reason why I am speak of this is because with my brithday coming up in a couple of weeks, I am getting older. I am not 40 yet but I am finally understanding why others in the past say to me that I need to be in better shape. I find all this funny because I had a feeling this was going to happen 10 years ago. It is one thing to work hard and live life but now I see it is time to slow down.
As I was sitting in the doctor's office, I was reading up on what I have. However, I came in with pain and discomfort. Doing something as simple as riding a bicycle would damn near be as painful as standing on a bad leg for hours. Before coming to this doctor, another doctor was saying I am too young for a knee replacement and even if I lose weight, this is permanate. Even though I was not an athlete this is how most athletes retire. I find myself waking up with pain and going to bed at night numbing the pain. Getting older is a suppose to be a slow process but in my case this sped up things.
To some people, this rambling about being older might not make sense but I am seeing that my body isn't getting younger and the things I use to do hurt now. People would tell me that most pains and aches can be solved with an asprin or motrin but sometimes you need something stronger. The only good thing about being in pain is the distraction from being depressed. Pain not only takes over but it makes you see things differently.
Most people think it is noble to work with pain but I am seeing that once you hurt moreso than normal, you stop moving and rest to ease up the pain. I might be able to go to the store or walk but it is hard to do it without grimacing or wincing in pain. I hope that when people see me now, they know I am not lazy but trying to make things worse. I know when I am 55 or 60 this will be worse but for now, I take things day to day.
Your Friend,
Eugene
Well it has been a busy couple of days. First of all, I have been getting help with my busted right knee. I found out back in April that my right knee is busted. Cracked kneecap, a small tear in my knee and fluid in my knee. So like my mother and my father, I have bursitis or arthritis in my knee. Basically, I cannot try to move like a young chicken anymore. The reason why I am speak of this is because with my brithday coming up in a couple of weeks, I am getting older. I am not 40 yet but I am finally understanding why others in the past say to me that I need to be in better shape. I find all this funny because I had a feeling this was going to happen 10 years ago. It is one thing to work hard and live life but now I see it is time to slow down.
As I was sitting in the doctor's office, I was reading up on what I have. However, I came in with pain and discomfort. Doing something as simple as riding a bicycle would damn near be as painful as standing on a bad leg for hours. Before coming to this doctor, another doctor was saying I am too young for a knee replacement and even if I lose weight, this is permanate. Even though I was not an athlete this is how most athletes retire. I find myself waking up with pain and going to bed at night numbing the pain. Getting older is a suppose to be a slow process but in my case this sped up things.
To some people, this rambling about being older might not make sense but I am seeing that my body isn't getting younger and the things I use to do hurt now. People would tell me that most pains and aches can be solved with an asprin or motrin but sometimes you need something stronger. The only good thing about being in pain is the distraction from being depressed. Pain not only takes over but it makes you see things differently.
Most people think it is noble to work with pain but I am seeing that once you hurt moreso than normal, you stop moving and rest to ease up the pain. I might be able to go to the store or walk but it is hard to do it without grimacing or wincing in pain. I hope that when people see me now, they know I am not lazy but trying to make things worse. I know when I am 55 or 60 this will be worse but for now, I take things day to day.
Your Friend,
Eugene
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