Summer Showdown: Fireworks

Dear Friends,

One of my only guilty pleasures in life are seeing or doing fireworks. I am a pyromaniac at heart and love lighting and seeing fireworks go off. I wish that I could keep this guilty pleasure but due to a personal issue, I had to give this up. As a kid, seeing fireworks go off or going to the annual fireworks show in Detroit was a blessing and joy for me. Like I said, in 2008 that all changed. This is the blog that will explain why it changed and also why I will never enjoy fireworks.

Here’s the story of why things change for me about fireworks and also why I can’t see them anymore:

In 2008, I was at the time dating my best friend. Now usually, I would not have someone with me while watching the fireworks in Detroit. This was a special year because I was dating someone that I wanted to date for years. So we are waiting for the fireworks to start and we talk about marriage. As the subject was gaining some interest, my friend asks me what I would say to her if I proposed. I speak from the heart. She was so moved that I decided to actually propose. She said yes. I was shocked.

Now what changed was the significance of her going to be my wife but also the events that occurred after the fact. I won’t go into details but we both know what happened. That also let me to AF and also the shit that happened with her. In 2009, I came to the decision after watching the fireworks and crying. The fireworks are not something I want to see anymore without crying. With that said, I could do fireworks but seeing professional fireworks makes me cry.

Now even though I speak to my best friend still, going to the fireworks or even going to certain places in Detroit makes me sad. I am trying to fight my depression. I guess I could let it go but I cannot because of the other shit that occurred. Now that I shared that, I want to say that I am happy to get that off my chest and also out in the open. That’s all for now, but there is more to come in the madness of my life.

Eugene Chandler III