November To Remember: My History with November

Dear Friends,

I usually don’t like using the word hate but I hate November and December. This is what I call the curse of November. It seems like the most traumatic events in my life occur just before Thanksgiving. I think I wrote about getting dumped and having my bouts of depression back in 2006 when I was kicked out by my ex and told me never to come back. I avoid November like most people avoid beggars in the street. December is worse but I will discuss November.

I use to not like this time of the year because it brings family together and we have something to be thankful of. However, I do not like this time of the year because of so many traumatic experiences that further made me depressed. All the missed times to bond with family is nothing compared to being evicted out of a home, or getting dumped. My last good November was back in 1999. The only reason why it was good to me is simply because it was the last time I got together with my family. If you ever saw the movie Soul Food, you know what happened to cause the family to break up. Even though that movie had a happy ending, my life is nothing but tragedy. Some people think I am being dramatic about my life but I know what it is like to not celebrate holidays. Especially since I am single again, this November not only left me with a bitter taste but no where to go and really nothing to be thankful for except not being in jail and not being dead.

All I can do is get through this month without drinking my sorrows away, getting high, or even taking my life. I guess all I can do is take it day to day because looking ahead is stressing me out or making my life more chaotic that I know it is. For the second time in my life, I not only got dumped before Thanksgiving but I also have to fight to not be depressed and focus on something aside from the past. For now, I am going to work on me and my sins. That’s all for now but more to come.

Eugene Chandler III