November To Remember: A Weekend Of Revelations and Healing

Dear Friends,

            As of today, I am happy and blessed. I am happy to be able to think and breathe. I am blessed to be able to see today and hopefully tomorrow. I am not going to use this entry to bash or demean my current ex. This entry is about my weekend of revelation and healing. I will say that I learned my lesson about second chances with someone. I am someone that gives second chances and also get second chances.

            My first revelation is that I need to finally work on myself. I have been hearing for years that I jump from woman to woman. I don’t make time for myself and I cling on to my woman. So I am not looking for someone at all. I know by doing that, someone will come to me. I just hope that it does not happen anytime soon. My second revelation is that my time has come to find new surroundings. No more running to my mom or family. I need to fly somewhere else. My final revelation is simply to know and love Eugene. I change my ways and my life to accommodate my woman. No more of that because I need to be myself. My current ex hated that I did that but I did it to avoid fights.

            Usually I would cry or beg to be with my ex but this is different. I had a feeling this was not going to work out like I wanted because there was so much going on. There were things that I was not use to dealing with but I dealt with it like a soldier. After my dealings with Andrea, I told myself to not make more mistakes. I might have slipped but I worked through it. However, with Michelle there were many issues I had to deal with that could not be fought or dealt with. I am not passing blame or throwing a pity party as she might think. I can say that I am happy rather than sad because as much as I loved Michelle, our baggage came between us.

            So my future is not clear, and my heart is healing. I have not lost my faith because God is with me. All I know is that for now, I am alive and well. I am going to be a great man for someone but for now, I will love the man I am. Someone once told me that you need to wake up and tell yourself to smile, dance and remember what makes you a great person. Well I smile more than I use to. I dance in the shower or alone. Finally, I remember that I am not some dumb ass but a very smart and talented man. That’s all for now but more to come.

Eugene Chandler III