Summer Showdown: Defining DEFY and HOPE

Dear Friends,

While I was away, I came up with something that kept my mind clear and also made crystal clear sense to me. People come up with things, sayings and mantras that end up motivating not only the soul but the fire deep inside. I almost forgot about it once I did not need it anymore. I remember it now because I need it more than ever. So what is this mystery thing? Well it is actually two things: D.E.F.Y. and H.O.P.E.

D.E.F.Y. means do everything for yourself. For years, I have been letting myself go. I can love the world but I could not say I love myself. Something I read while away said that self love is hard to do because there are so many things that come between loving yourself and loving others. I think my reasons are more simple and personal. To love myself requires me to remember things that I don’t want to remember. Some of my best moments are suppressed because I did not like how it was done. I can love others whole heartedly but loving myself is harder because of the pressure I put on myself. D.E.F.Y. also came about from dealing with my ex and how much of a pussy I almost became. So for now, I am learning to love what I do and take responsibilities for my faults and mistakes.

H.O.P.E. means help others perform excellently. I use to do a lot of volunteer work in Detroit. I use to build wheelchair ramps, help Habitat for Humanity, help tutor kids, and a lot more. I stopped because my drive burned out. I also stopped because it was not fun to do it anymore. So I came up with H.O.P.E. because as I learn to love myself that I need to also help others. My problem is that I was never taught to be selfless. I learned that as an adult. I also learned to share my talents with others. So this is my way to help the community and also help myself learn selflessness. Ironic that the word and the acronym have the same meaning: to have faith in something aside from yourself.

Both these things I came up with are ways for me to get my life together. I was happy to get my associates degree in April. I finally finished something in my life. I defied the doubters and gave hope to my family and myself. So not only did I do those things but by creating these acronyms this is my way to continue my dreams and work on bettering myself. There will be more to come.





Eugene Chandler III