Dear Friends,
Next month, my son is going to be three years old. Now I don’t talk about my son because it causes me great sadness. Not because he’s my son but the stress of dealing with it. I decided recently rather to be upset at my son’s mother to try to play nice. I decided to do that because my son does not deserve that from me. Now I am trying to also talk more about him and hope to see him. That’s only because as I get older, I find myself changing to be a better man. I want my son to be a better man than I am. So like I asked in my last blog: Am I a father? To be honest with you, I cannot say yes. I know my ex is a great mother.
I know I will not get father of the year. Just like my father, I am moving on with my life and also getting my life in order. Most people think it is easy being a parent. It is not. Not in this world we live in. Especially to those who create a kid but don’t want him at all. I am trying to stop that mentality in me. My son is going to hate me because I was not there and also because the lack of time I spent with him. Someone asked me if my son calls someone else daddy. To be honest with you, I don’t know. I’m not going to say I don’t care but I know that he will not call me daddy.
So as this month come to a close soon, there is a lack of responsibility to all those African American men who get a woman pregnant but don’t want the kid. Regardless if the woman is the same race or different, it is up to that man to take responsibility of that child. With that said, that’s where my journey starts and hopefully, I can make that something that will bring me happiness.
Eugene Chandler III
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