Winter Wonderland: Moving On is Hard

Dear Friends,

The other day, I had a friend come to me about her break up and also what her ex did to her. Now without give out all her business, she basically had an ex that was a user and was also fucking around with an ex. So my friend was heart broken and depressed. However, as she was trying to get over this person, I was not being a good friend. I wish I could say this was a typical relationship but from what I gathered, this was not a good relationship. Basically, this person was using them from the start. She knew it and so did I. What is funny is that the reason why I basically was being a dick is not only was she blinded by this ex but also because why is it easy for some to move on but hard for others who think they are in love. Well I am going to discuss that as best I can.

It took me over ten years to see that it is hard to move on from someone but it needs to be done. Through out the years, I would be just like my friend and wallow and cry over someone hurting me. It took some years and also some friend’s advice about basically moving on and forward. If you were truly in love then it would take longer but if you were in love but the other person wasn’t then why wallow. Basically it boils down to if you don’t care; the other person is not caring as well.

Something that my friend is scared to do is move on. Why is hard for people to move on after a relationship? Something else I learned from all the relationship I had is that moving on is hard but after you do, life gets better and easier. As my friend was wallowing in this messed up relationship, I kept thinking about why is it hard to move on. Moving on is beneficial because people assume the other person is crying over them. Most people don’t know is that if you loved someone and the relationship ends, they are moving on to forget you. I learned that the hard way because I made the mistake of assuming. Never assume what someone else is doing after they leave your life.

Finally, I guess I should be more considerate but the truth is that since I was at this point and wasn’t going to give a pass. People these days are assholes and bitches because they don’t want to be nice. People don’t want to admit that times are tough and even being in a relationship is only good when there is trust. This relationship was lacking trust and also lacking the necessary decorum to be called a relationship. My friend got used. She needs to move on. Stop allowing someone to fuck them over and show them and yourself that you are going to be with someone better. My friend doesn’t see that because she was whipped to being in love. I see that because I won’t allow anyone else to hurt me.

Eugene Chandler III